Ever notice your cat giving you what seems like a death stare, along with the cold shoulder and a feisty attitude to boot? When they do, it’s easy to feel like you’ve done something wrong and worry about how long this behavior would last. As pet parents, these mood shifts can be unsettling. You might be wondering - Can cats hold grudges? And if they do, how long do cats hold grudges?
There’s no need to fret! Discover how to navigate these feline friction moments and keep your bond strong. Read on for tips on maintaining harmony with your finicky friend.
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Do Cats Hold Grudges
Contrary to what it might seem, cats don’t hold grudges like humans do. According to Stephen Quandt, a certified feline trainer and founder of Cat Behavior Help, their behavior is more about associations with us than about holding onto resentment. In short — your cat’s moods are all about how they link their experiences with you.
Understanding Cat Emotions
Grief and Sadness
Cats do experience grief and sadness, but not in the same way humans do. Cats may grieve the loss of a companion by searching for them and vocalizing, says Quandt. Signs of sadness in cats can include lethargy, loss of appetite, and depression. However, pinpointing their exact feelings is challenging as they do not express grief like humans.
Anger and Stress
What are the signs that your cat is mad at you? The thing is, cats don’t experience anger in the way humans do. Instead, what may seem like anger is often a response to stress, conflict, fear, or anxiety. This can manifest as growling, hissing, yowling, or aggression. Thus, cats are not truly "angry" but are reacting to perceived threats or discomfort.
Grudges vs. Associations
Cats do not hold grudges as humans do. Instead, they form associations based on their experiences. For instance, if a cat has a negative experience in a certain area, they might avoid that spot in the future for fear of the experience happening again. According to Dr. Rebecca Macmillan, BVetMed, BSAVA, PGCertSAM, MRCVS, this behavior is a survival instinct rather than a grudge.
Similarly, if you step on your cat by accident, they may have an aversion for you for a little while, not because they are holding a grudge, but because it’s their way of protecting themselves. But not to worry - most cats come around in no time, especially if their memory of you is pleasant, remembering how you feed and take care of them.
Grudges are complex emotions, and there's no evidence that cats hold grudges like humans do. Instead, cats respond to negative experiences by associating them with discomfort. For example, if a cat had a bad experience with baths, it might show displeasure or avoid the tub in the future. Similarly, cats with past negative interactions with humans (e.g. physical abuse) might react defensively. These responses are rooted in instinctive survival mechanisms rather than emotional grudges.
In one reddit discussion, a user was asking whether cats hold grudges. This was because he accidentally stepped on his cat’s tail, and he noticed how his cat began swatting at him whenever he went near. People responded saying that it was probably because the cat associated it with the memory of the negative experience, but they assured him that his cat will likely forgive him soon enough when the incident isn’t repeated.
Behavioral Responses
When cats appear to be avoiding you or acting out, it might seem like they are holding a grudge. In reality, they are likely reacting to a recent negative experience. Dr. Bethany Hsia, DVM, veterinarian and co-founder of CodaPet, notes that most cats will get over such aversions within a day or two. Understanding that cats are driven by instinct and memory rather than emotion can help in managing and interpreting their behavior.
To better understand your cat’s behavior, monitoring them using a pet camera such as the Petcube Cam 360 may be of big help. Petcube Cam has features such as a 110° wide-angle view, 1080p full HD video, 8x zoom capability, among others. It also gives you access to an online vet service for concerns about your pet’s health and behavior.
How Long Does a Cat Hold a Grudge
If you feel that your cat is acting out because of a negative experience, you might be wondering - “How long do cats hold grudges?” While there is no evidence of cats holding grudges, they do make associations based on memory. So how long do cats retain memories of people and events?
Cats have both long-term and short-term memories and can remember people for up to 10 years, according to Stephen Quandt. They also retain positive and negative associations with people, places, and sounds. However, pinpointing exactly what upsets them is challenging since we can't know their precise thoughts. If a cat has a negative experience with someone, it might remember the event and associate it with that person, leading to fear or avoidance behavior.
Do Cats Forgive
In general, pet cats value their parents for providing them with love, warmth, food, and shelter, and want to maintain a good relationship. However, in instances when you feel your cat is holding a grudge on you, you might wonder - Are cats forgiving? Will my cat forgive me after a negative experience?
Cats generally don’t hold grudges unless they've been abused. To mend things after a misunderstanding, find out how your cat shows affection and respond accordingly. Some cats perk up at the sound of wet food, while others prefer a head rub or snuggling in warm blankets.
Based on your cat's preferences, be sure to show them some love, may it be offering them a treat, a cuddle, or a favorite blanket to make amends. They’ll likely forgive you and give love back.
Having a Petcube Cam 360 comes in handy for you to have a better grasp of what irks your cat and what makes them happy. That way, you can create more positive experiences for your feline friend.
Conclusion
While cats may exhibit behaviors that seem like grudges, these are usually based on learned associations rather than true resentment. Their reactions are more about avoiding discomfort and ensuring their safety than about holding onto past grievances.
To maintain harmony with your cat, understanding their behavior - including what irks or triggers them, may help you avoid such negative experiences from happening. Instead, focus on creating positive experiences to keep them happy, healthy and comfortable.